axePosted: December 6, 2011
growing up during the christmas season my dad would always remind us how good we had it and how his holidays as a kid were not what dreams are made of. and the one story that remained a constant was the christmas when the only gift he received was an axe.
apparently there was another christmas of dad’s when he only got half a powdered donut, but that doesn’t relate to today’s post.
i couldn’t fathom his life as a kid.
here i was getting dolls and suzie homemaker ovens and lifesaver books and gold chocolate coins and the big box of 64 crayola crayons with the sharpener in the back and he only got an axe??? one stinkin’ axe? it was all very foreign and very sad to me.
so the other day i was trolling ebay.
and i saw the strangest thing.
and i had to bid on it.
another holline item. made in denmark.
with an axe.
now, santa with an axe is all kinds of wrong to me. what is santa doing with an axe? it immediately conjures up evil in my head. very “lizzie borden” of him.
who designed this thing? of all the things in all the world to put in santa’s hand, like a puppy or a teddy bear or a candy cane or a cup of hot chocolate or ANYTHING not murder related, i wanna know what the thought process was of this designer who said, “hmmm, this santa is missing something, he needs something in his hands, hmmm, yes, i’ve got it! santa needs an axe.”
now, if it’s for chopping wood and not for murder, it still doesn’t make sense. santa doesn’t work on his 364 days off. he eats. put a turkey leg in his hand for gawd’s sake.
so i guess the point is, if a designer is making santas who gives axe gifts to children, dad must not have been the only kid to receive an axe. it could have been the norm. desirable even. “santa brought me an axe, yo. high-five.”